Who Are You When Im Not Looking

I have always been one who wears my heart on my sleeve. I am super gullible. I believe everything someone says. Im slowly learning though that i should not believe everything i hear. Trust is a big thing with me. I used to trust so easily but now i dont trust all that well. At times, i feel like i cant trust anyone and that everyone is out to get me. LOL. this is not always the case.

After getting out of a three year relationship that had more downs than ups, i never thought that i would fall in love again with anyone. I especially didnt think that it would have happened so fast. But it has. August 4th marks one of the best decisions that i have ever made. I started officially dating the guy that i consider to be one of my best friends. I trust him with everything i have.

I have lately discovered that i have been trying to push him away. Why? I dont know. I honestly am afraid of lettng my guard down and getting my heart broken again. But I am not going to worry about that. I am not going to let myself miss out on something so wonderful & on something that i have been so happy with thus far.

And i know that there are people out there who are waiting for us to fail as a couple and im not going to let others unhappiness affect my happiness. Yes, I have made bad choices in the past and have been a huge bitch to people at times, but with Jordan and his son, i am finding myself trying to become the better person. With them, i feel like I can be myself and they'll love me for who i am.

I used to always say that i didnt care what others had to say about me, but that's a lie. Now its starting to be true. Lol. I only need Jordan's and my family's approval for anything in my life.

Being with Jordan has been the best decision that i have ever made! I dont regret one single moment of it. They are my world!
♥
xoxo

Come A Little Closer

God Gave Me You

My life has been absolutely perfect lately. I can honestly say that i have never been so happy. I have a wonderful boyfriend who has a wonderful son and an amazing family. I feel so blessed to have them all in my life! 

I absolutely adore Jordan's son. I love this little boy! i treat him as if he was my own. I feel myself growing up alittle bit more each day. When he's around, i worry more about what he's eating, drinking, doing. I constantly worry about what he's doing, if things are good enough for him, is he eating nutritiously. I worry more about him than i do with my appearance or anything really relating to me. Because its not about me, its about this little boy who is absolutely wonderful!!

I am in complete awe with Jordan. he's absolutely the best thing i could ever ask for. He accepts me for who i am, dingy self and all. We're pretty inseparable. No complaints here either. :)  we just had our 1 month! which is pretty exciting! I cannot picture him not in my life. 

When You Say Nothing At All

I never thought that i would be so happy so fast after a terrible breakup. But i am. I've never been happier with Jordan. He is absolutely amazing. I worry everyday that something might happen and he'll walk away. I feel like he makes me a better person. He's an amazing father, a wonderful boyfriend, a terrific son, a phenomenal boyfriend, and all-in-all a fantastic person. He accepts me for who i am.

Thursday was my 24th birthday! I got to celebrate it with this amazing guy! The only thing that would have made it better was if his little guy would have been able to be there. :) Love that little boy to pieces!! But i digress. LOL. My mother made angel food cake stuffed with strawberry creme pudding and the icing was Cool Whip. So fricken delicious. 

We ended up heading to Kendalls. I ended up drinking 3 sex on the beaches, 2 jager bombs, 2 jello shots, and a smirnoff grape. Yummy! Danielle and I wound up singing karaoke to "Til The World Ends" by Britney! :) We destroyed it. LOL. After we left Kendalls, we headed to Denny's to get some grub. I actually stayed up longer than jordan this time. haha

I had set pretty high expectations for my birthday and i was pretty bummed that it wasn't as exciting as i had planned on it being but i got to spend it with my boyfriend. That definitely help make this one a pretty good birthday!! :)

One thing I can say, i'd be lost without him!! I'm so attached to him! Ive never been happier.

:)